Jack and Jerry

The great quality about negative people is the implied kindness they have. They provide a wonderful bed of contrast for me so I don’t have to work as hard. I can just mumble something positive  and they start to melt.

Even when they increase the negativity to 100% mass of the space we occupy, that is a dance of anticipation, a profound emphasis, on any positive utterance that I can drool. They’re teasing me with ease of home runs.

The negative person loves me so much that they purposefully throw me lob balls to crank out of the park.

I mean, that’s kindness. They get totally into their servitude towards me, with the full body expressing of unfiltered bile. It’s crazy the lengths of service people will go to produce such pristine freshly combed negative context.  So all I have to do is show up and and say something nice about something arbitrary and they all start weeping.

That’s kindness. I would hug you but I know how love makes you feel good, and I, honestly, like home runs too much to hug you. We have a good thing going.

Save it for someone that gives a harry ****

Awee… That’s so sweet. You know my love language.

Fuck you, Jerry.

But we’re both straight, Jack. Now that’s love. You would go against your own male hetero bravado. I’m touched.



Nice shoes btw.

Awwww… Thanks

What, all I said was nice shoes, bro.

Yeah, but it was cool thing to say. I just got’em

Oh. 😉


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